Posted by Admin on May 29, 2017
‘Shop ‘til you drop’. An interesting concept, eh? There is a difference between shopping for the necessities and shopping for the sake of feeling better, or there is nothing better to do, or I ‘need’ new shoes, never mind that there are already 86 pairs in 3 closets.
Exercise: grab a pad of paper and your favorite pen and set an appointment with yourself for an hour or so on Saturday or Sunday afternoons to go to the mall each weekend for a month. Walk the mall until you find a place to sit down, grab a cup of coffee and sit, relax and watch people, noticing the shoppers. The goal is to just watch people and try to pick out ones that have a satisfying, fulfilling life and are shopping for the sheer joy of it – they probably actually need whatever they are shopping for. While you are watching, notice how many people tend to have almost blank stares on their faces, pay attention to their body language, how they carry themselves – do they walk upright with a purpose, or are they just kind of trudging through the mall carrying their prizes? The biggest give-away is their eyes. You can see a sparkle in the eyes of the people that are there because they simply want to be as opposed to the dull, blank stares of the people that are there because they are trying to get away from something, they are not exactly sure what, they are just uncomfortable wherever they were – probably home – and just needed to get out for a while.
Note: it is important that you do this for at least four consecutive weeks for a couple of reasons:
- learning to read people takes practice – it takes practice because here is the clincher – watch away, but reserve judgement – just notice how they are acting, how they look, etc.
- one of the ways to begin to unlock hidden memories is discipline – conscious, self-discipline.
This is likely something you may not have even thought of doing. Therefore, it is likely to be somewhat uncomfortable – that is just your ego trying to regain control. The hardest task and the one that will be key in setting you free from your bonds is taming the ego. What about the pad of paper and the pen, you ask? As you sit and watch people, a lot of thoughts will come through your mind, some of which you will want to remember – so keep a journal of your ‘mall watching’.
More often than not, many people continue to go mall watching even after the initial four week period. Here comes the hardest part of people-watching – whatever people you focus on and watch for awhile also have a message for you. Pay attention to your thoughts about the people you watch and as you do so, ask yourself, do I ever do that, or feel like that, or walk like that? If you say no, don’t start rejoicing just yet – there is a list of ‘externals’ coming up that you no doubt will relate to. J As you will soon see, this is a wonderful, relaxing – almost meditative – exercise in uncovering the hidden memories of your own self. While it is not imperative to know all of the things that hold you back, it is helpful to know some of the major limiting beliefs. It is just nice to know what we want or need to change.
This is also helpful to increase your overall awareness. When you visit the mall for a few weeks, you very quickly learn to see a much bigger picture than when you are there shopping or walking around. Do this exercise and see if you don’t start looking forward to going by the third week. Another excellent vantage point to watch is the food court where you can dig in and start to understand….